Life at Twenty-Something.

2001-10-01T14:26:00.000-04:00

This is not officially dead yet! We have to bring it back people! Remember all the good times on this page ranting about getting old and stuff? Well, maybe we've just accepted the fact that we're old now, but still! Come on peeps...lets bring this baby back!

2001-09-07T13:19:00.000-04:00

Wendy. You have a blog? I'll show you how to link em up later. just icq me.
I think this blog is officially dead. haha.

2001-08-28T22:40:00.000-04:00

yo ok i'm completely comp dumb here....but how do u put links to ur blogspot to other ppls blogs??

2001-04-25T10:52:00.000-04:00

Guys, I'm thinking of re-designing this page before school starts so we can have a fun-filled summer of bloggin' in style. Feed me some ideas please, otherwise this site will probably end up looking a lot like my own. Though this might not be such a bad thing (dammit, I'm so god damn humble), variety is the spice of life, right? Wrong! Hitler had the right idea. Arian race all the way! Muahahahahaha.. okay, I'm officially insane.

But I'm serious about re-designing this page. Please shoot me some ideas!

2001-04-23T23:06:00.000-04:00

AHH..there we go =)
it worked,
thx dave!

2001-04-23T23:05:00.000-04:00

WUT THE CRAPPY!?!?!?!?!

ok, i jus tried to post a msg and i get this:

"sorry blogger is currently down for some quick maintene. will be back up in a jiffy....thanx for ur patience!?

i have no patience..i typed this huge blog and it's ALL GONE!!!!! AHHHHHHH ..heh..so i guess i can relate to angel's blog about her work report going blank..that's really horrible...that would TOTALLY suck..=(...however..i'm not goign to re-type my blog. not 2nite at least, arggg..stupid blog..well wutever.

ok..good thing dave told me to copy and PASTE...so then i don't hafta retype again..haha..that's how the above reappeared again =) ..ok..it didn't post the first time..this is soo messed...i can't seem to get this to work..lets try again!

2001-04-20T15:21:00.000-04:00

All this talk about how life is not as good as we all imagined it and stuff. How we're all closing doors, and how essentially it's all downhill from here on in. How life ain't gonna be as exciting as it seemed back in the day. We were all dreamers who were gonna be millionaires or movie stars or ballerinas. Uhm, okay, scratch off that last one there. But still, I was thinking last night and I realized that although it's true that all these bad things are happening, and our lives are taking paths which aren't so extravagant etc etc, I've learned to appreciate things more lately. Little things that I've always taken for granted when I was younger. I won't give any examples, but I'm sure you can all sort of relate with me here at some level.

I guess it's sort of a mixed blessing kinda thing. Sure, a few years back we peeked over yonder to the other side, and saw lush green grass. Now that we're realizing that the green grass is actually brown, when a brown blade of grass speckled with even the smallest hints of green shows up, we can appreciate it more. You get my drift here? Sure, you can call it comprimise, or lowering of standards. And that's exactly what it is. But who cares anymore, right? Happiness isn't reaching that lush green field. Happiness is redefining what 'green' really is to you, and not giving a shit that you're redefining it.

2001-04-10T13:45:00.000-04:00

F*cking piece of sh*t!! I just lost a 1/2 day's worth of my work report! AHHHHH!!! Stupid computers! MAN! I actually worked my ass off this morning too and now it's ALL GONE! =*( I knew my luck was running low today when my boss asked us where we're at with the friggin' reports and the other gals are pretty much done except me, but this is INSANE! What the hell did I do to deserve this? It's not my fault I couldn't write up a report without sufficient data, or I would've done it long ago! DAMMIT! ARGH!! Stupid stupid machines! Stupid disk ate my report! "Word cannot open document"..."This document does not exist"...what the hell!!

2001-04-09T23:42:00.000-04:00

Ten years down the road. Well, maybe fifteen years down the road, you'll be taking that road trip down to somewhere in the States, and your little five year old will tap you on your shoulder while you're driving, and ask:

Dad, can you roll down the window? It's hot.

So you'll hit the "down" button on the rear left window. But then, being the curious little guy that he is, he'll stop a moment to think and ask with a puzzled look on his face:

Dad, why do they call it rolling down the window?

2001-04-07T00:43:00.000-04:00

I've been reading the past few blogs about life and yeah… I can totally relate. It's hard to believe that i'm having a mid-life crisis at 20, but when you guys describe it so well one can't help but think. I mean what Shinfoo says about those doors is so true... when I was younger everything seemed possible... the dream of becoming the next Michael Jordan or Andre Agassi were but a few because hey… I was only 15… the world was my oyster. Well.... 5 years later i'm in my 2nd year of university and those dreams have passed out like a drunken fool who downed too much rum in too little time and chased it down with Boones. =/

I guess u could reason with the fact that there was no way in hell i was gonna be either of them anyway... but what I loved about it was that back then possibility was there... as remote as it was... it was still there. And now... (as everyone has mentioned) more and more of these doors are closing and the predictability of our future is becoming less and less. So when I think of it from this perspective, it sounds hella depressing.

Surprisingly tho, I haven’t really taken the same view as everyone else and right now I think I’m pretty comfortable where I am. I guess I’d like to believe that most of my ‘hopes and dreams’ are still alive and kicking… I guess they’re not dreams per say….more like dream-lets. I mean I don’t have those ludicrous “fantasy dreams” where my name is Buck Naked or Will Hunting… but I do have ‘aspirations’ of stuff I’d like to do before I settle down. In a sense these are so much better than fantasies because a) they’re attainable and b) I don’t get all depressed when my head comes back down to earth. I mean I may not be Vince Carter or Gustavo Kuertin.. but what I do have ain’t all that bad… I have a good family.. a prosperous future.. and I couldn’t have asked for better friends to ponder the ‘meaning of life’ with.. =)

For me, I’d take the ‘chapter written in a book’ over the ‘door closing’ analogy any day… or rather I’d take the perspective of an unfinished piece of clay that still has yet to be molded into a spectacular masterpiece. =) Who said our dreams were dying anyway? I mean I never understood why everyone was in such a rush to carve their future into stone and settle down before 30… I mean what for? So we can do the same job and settle into a set routine over and over and over for another 30 more? Why not take your time and get some variety in your life? Do something different and don’t be afraid to switch to something new if you don’t like what you’re in now… Of course I say this trying to be the young, go-getter of my earlier youth…. In today’s society no one wants to be a student at the age of 28 and who would honestly want to throw 2 years of tuition down the toilet?… I know I wouldn’t… I guess we’ll see if that’s my downfall 20 years down the road. But for some reason I’m not too worried… I mean life is like a box of chocolates…you nev- ah forgetit….

Peace out

2001-04-06T16:58:00.000-04:00

I bet many of you are going to be surprised that I'm hitting up this blog and actually putting a post here....I haven't written in this blog (or my blog for that matter!) in quite a while...but today I thought I should. I really need to get some crap off my chest...and this is what bloggering is for right?! To get things off your chest, to tell people your thoughts and feelings....

Right now what I'm feeling is depression...not depression with my family, loved ones or friends....but depression with my job. I know that right now this is only a 4-month work term...but I really really hate my job and being here just makes me sick. =Þ I bet you guys spent all afternoon half-assing your work, bloggering, and ICQing all at the same time. Do you wanna know what I did? I was crying behind my cubicle. Why? Well like I said before, because I hate my job. No one here likes me or even appreciates me for that matter. It's been 3 1/2 damn months that I've been here and I haven't learned a single nothing. Nothing. Nada. Isn't this what co-op is for? To gain work experience?? Well obviously not for me.

All that I've been doing ever since I've been hired is filing, answering the phones, filing...you get the picture. When I ask for more work...they tell me they: a) either have nothing for me to do, or b) work is too hard for me.....it's mostly b) because they really don't trust me here. They think I am a retard (excuse my language for you PCer's out there). I even got Park to bring home a tax program and download it on his comp so he could should me how to complete a tax return. I was thinking it would be a good way to impress my superiors....but guess what? That idea bombed too....all I ended up with was a bunch of people yelling at me for trying to do work which they claimed I couldn't handle. What the hell do they want from me?!

I'm a big worrywart too....so by not being a good worker, this leads me to believe that maybe accounting isn't the right field for me...what am I doing in this program anyway? I've obviously demonstrated that I'm a complete idiot with no sense of knowledge at all in the workplace, and it's not like school is a bowl of cherries either.... =Þ I think I've already said enough...shocked enough people perhaps? I dunno...and I really dunno what was the purpose of me spilling my thoughts and feelings to people, some strangers perhaps ....maybe to elicit some sympathy...maybe to be heard....all I know is that Stephchin is one unhappy camper...

"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the clouds." Ya, right...what a load of baloney...... =*(

2001-04-06T02:57:00.000-04:00

I think Matt hit it right on the button with his Summer Vacation analogy.

For me thus far, life's been a series of these so called 'summer vacations'. I look back at highschool. I see that it wasn't as f-awsome as I thought it would be back in the first day of grade nine. Sure, it was good. But just not awsome. I mean, damn. Back in grade nine, OAC courses seemed so fuckin hard, and beyond my grasp. I shivered at the sound of OAC Physics or [gasp]... Calculus. But now that I've taken those courses, they're not as mysterious and awe-some (as in awe-inspiring) as I thought. Let's talk about girls. Oh mang. First day of highschool, girls galore. Better yet, they were all in these sexy kilts (catholic school) [perverted grin]. So much opportunity there. I would get to know these girls, I would become friends with these girls, and a lucky dozen or so of them would be my girlfriends. Ahh, the romance. The excitement. But in the end, I only had one girlfriend, a few heartbreaking rejections, and did lots of foolish things that I regret.

And this pattern goes on and on. I find myself looking back after every stepping stone or phase in my life, and can't help but to feel like I missed out. Sure, there were the 'moments'. Little surges of happiness or excitement, but nothing compared to what I had in mind. I find myself constantly waiting for "REAL" life to start. The life that I've always imagined in my head. But life is just one disappointment after another. So now what? Do I finally catch on, and recognize that pattern that's forming? Then what? Lower my expectations? Fuck that! Haha. I hope I don't EVER hafta resort to thinking "This is the best things will ever get. Why not just live it out? Live in the now. Accept your fate. Dammit, you've tried your best."

I guess Sean Connery said it best in The Rock: "Your best?!? Haha... Only losers whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen!" Ahh, words of the wise. Words to live by. I'll leave the whole comprimising bit for when I get married. For now, I've gotta find me some prom queens.

2001-04-05T22:22:00.000-04:00

Ok.. I was going to post this. but.. mmm.. it came out a little long.
I agree with steph. you are one awesome writer dave ;) must be all those fantasy books ya read heh ya nerdbomb.
anyway.. about angel's entry. man. i really had no clue what i was getting into when i chose UW for CS. it was either UW or U of T for commerce. and UW came out the big winner because of the juicy entrance bursary that i received. i wonder how things would be if i chose U of T. and during oac when it was time to choose which Uni's to apply to... damn... i had no clue what i wanted to do. i just did what the next guy did and picked what path would bring me a good future and of course... $$$ (oh yeh... and for us girls.. heh.. marry that future bill gates).

2001-04-05T22:10:00.000-04:00

So you guys are finally understanding what it's all about.

I think the unpredictability of life is what keeps us happy. Just knowing that anything is possible creates a lust for life. You can't wait to see how this story called life unfolds. I could use a gay analogy how our life is a book, but I won't. What I will compare it to is summer vacation.

Think about the beginning of summer. You have all these grand plans on how to enjoy this oasis of time. You're gonna relax. You're gonna spend time with all your friends. Your gonna have endless nights of fun. You might even take a vacation to California and have the experience of a life time. Like, at this point, who knows what'll happen?? Just the thought of all these possibilities are enough to make you pee.

So time passes, and you haven't really accomplished all you thought you would've. So you didn't go on that vacation or you didn't go out that much with your friends. There's still plenty of time the do those things. But then, everyone starts getting jobs, including yourself, and then you don't have time to do any of these things you envisioned. And then, before you know it, you're approaching the last week of summer and you really haven't done anything you hoped to accomplish. You might no longer be working and you do have a week left to try to cram in as much fun as possible, but at this point, it just seems fruitless. School's around the corner and you hafta prepare for the big move, so you're busy again... At the point, you look back and reflect upon how the summer panned out -- and it wasn't even close to what was envisioned.

Even as a kid, you ever notice how the last week of summer was different and completely sucked -- even though, on the surface, everything was the same? Just knowing you are close to the end...

Well, you people are smart, you can figure out what is what in that stupid little rant.

Stop reading this and do your work reports.

2001-04-05T01:55:00.000-04:00

I Just read Angel's latest post. (I'll just copy and paste)
She says:

"I used to love this Japanese sausage snack things when I was a kid (oh I'll show YOU a japanese sausage thing...). Recently, I tried it again thinking "ooh, this is gonna be so SWEEEET!!" but when I put it in my mouth, BLAH! It was so gross.

As I grew up my taste has changed, and it will continue to change. Doesn't that apply for major decisions in my life too? I mean, a human constantly changes their mind on different subjects, and that very much includes career paths. We make our ultimate decision of what we want to be at the age of 17/18. I look at 17/18 year olds today and think they're kids. How do we know what the right decision is when we haven't even grown up and experienced the world yet? I'm sure many people by fluke choose their dream career and live happily ever after. Or they could be those very fortunate people who know what they want to do with themselves. But not everyone's that lucky. By the time we figure out we made a mistake, we're either too old or too broke to start over. And it'd be a waste too to throw away the years of pain and suffering even in the process of getting a degree.

I'm 20, already 12 grand in debt, and I've spent 3 terms trying to pass all my courses to get a degree I don't know if I want or what I'm gonna use it for. I just hope I won't regret putting myself through 5 years of torture for nothing. That would REALLY suck. But then, I wouldn't mind wasting my education if I won the lottery and won't have to work at all. That'd be a different story."

And here's my response. Well, it's sorta related to what she wrote.

He (I) says: Eh, so I says to the guy, I says... [it sounds better if you imagine a forced gino accent]

I think from now on in, life is gonna be a series of closing doors. Most of the time not by our own will. I think Youth is fuckin awsome thing. I define youth as "having the mindset that anything is possible". Man. Haha. Ignorance is bliss. I know, we've heard it all before.

Every day, more and more doors are closed. We all closed a huge muthafuckin' door when we chose U Waterloo. When we go off our own ways after Waterloo's had its way with us, more doors are gonna be closed. When we get married (heaven forbid), another massive door is closed. Some people might argue that when certain doors are closed, others are opened. I dunno about that one, mang. There's an infinite number of possible paths our lives can take. So in a sense, all doors are already open. Okay, I'm not sure how much sense that made, but you get the whole jist (no, not jizz you sick mofos) of my long-ass rant here. Fact is, we're (now more than ever before, as Angel pointed out) faced with the reality that life ain't gonna be as exciting or as rich (both meanings) or colorful as we thought. Some ppl have no probs with this, some eventually adapt to this, and others never will.

But I dunno what's worse. Accepting reality and living with it (i.e. comprimise) or always keeping the hope that one day you'll find true happiness (i.e. being a dreamer/massive denial). I wish life were a computer program (Woah...I know Kung Fu). If that were so, I'd write a 'while' loop.

While (notBoredYet == true)
{
StartHighschool();
HaveTheBestFiveYearsOfYourLife();
}

Okay, that was very very very lame. I guess Waterloo Comp Eng is finally crackin' my sanity. [overact-ish/goofy strained face] What have I become?!?!

2001-04-03T23:47:00.000-04:00

I'm still feeling jet lagged, yet, I never left the ground.

I'm talking about Daylight savings. It's really weird having an hour literally dissappear (i don't think I spelt that right) before your eyes. It's even worse when you are awake and the clock just skips an hour (freaky).

The background surrounding Daylight savings revolves around a chinese fisherman who was rowing in a lake when his boat began to sink, and along with it he went. All his friends and family wanted to preserve his body from nibbling fish so they had a race to the sunken boat and tossed rice into the area of the accident, in hopes that the fish would eat the rice instead of their fallen comrade. That is the story behind the dragonboat races.

2001-04-03T00:16:00.000-04:00

Here's a fork. Now pick a prong. There's left, right, and centre (ooh, Canadian spelling!). Which one do you choose to stab the meatball with?

Ok, that's a stupid analogy since a fork stabs the meatball, or annoying cousins, with all of its prongs. But my point is, there are certain moments in life where you know that the decision you will make will greatly impact your life.

Well, why you ask, am I blabbing about this? Well, I visited Dave's page and he wrote that he went to Queen's this past weekend. Yes, I would've liked to go, but I wasn't invited, but that's not the point. The point is that I was very damn close to going there. And when I mean close, I mean Mach3 close. I was gonna go there for a totally different program -- almost polar opposites to what I'm doing now. It was so close that I had both applications filled out, both res forms filled out, and had postage ready for each. I was torn at this point -- what should I pick? This decision will affect me forever -- not just academically, but socially. Who would I meet? Would I enjoy where I'm staying? And so on...

I had visited both schools previously in the year. First was Waterloo on November 4, 1998, then Queens on March 15, 1999. When I visited Waterloo, I thought the place was shit. It was really dark everywhere. All the buildings were odd looking and appeared like they came out of some futuristic nightmare (foreshadowing to my marks). Everyone seemed geeky (well, not the LOOsers who read this page, of course... cause none of you were there!), and of course, it smelt like goose shit. Basically, the place just freaked me out. After that visit, that school definitely was very low on my list.

Then I visited Queens. When I got there... I dunno how to describe it -- I just loved it -- everything about it. The campus, the buildings, the people. I loved the cold clean air in my lungs. I loved how the ivy swallowed all the Victorian-style buildings. I loved the whole aura the place gave off. The school was rampant with pride and tradition. I wanted to be a part of this, a part of everything. After my visit there, I was almost certain that this is where I would end up for the next four years.

Well, to make a long story not as long, things didn't work out that way. I'm just a masochist and I like to torture myself. From that comment alone, you can figure out where I ended up going (unless, you goto that school as well). But I don't really regret what path I've chosen. I look back at my first year with fond memories. I met a lot of good friends and we've had some heady times. But, I always wonder what the other path would've been like... even to this day.

It almost haunts me...

2001-04-02T20:35:00.000-04:00

Sorry, haven't blogged in awhile...been pretty busy with school...and now that exams are coming up, just doesn't make things better.
Well, I learned how to break for those of you who don't know already. And for those of you who have no idea what I'm "breaking"...it's break dancing.=)
Too, bad you weren't at the Bomber last friday, we did a routine!=) It was a lot of fun, breaking for the first time...although I was in extreme pain afterwards and the days after that...it's all good=)

Aiights...exams are approaching...gotta hit the books=)
Laterz all...

2001-04-02T03:16:00.000-04:00

Written in post-romance-movie delerium. Literally:
I look back a few years, and laugh when I realize how foolish I was. A stupid little naive boy who actually believed in the thing called 'true love'. When I felt 'romance', it was something 'magical' and not some fuckin' hormones or other chemicals being released into my body, or an altered state of mind that all somehow boils down to my drive for sex or creating offspring. I watched movies, and read books, and I believed that it was possible for life to be like that. Romantic. Dramatic.

The first time I felt love was on a bus ride home from an elementary school ski trip. I sat beside this girl that I had a crush on, and by the end of the ride home, we were holding hands and she was resting her head on my shoulder. That was honestly one of the happiest moments of my life. Things were so simple back then. My heart was bigger than my brain. Insecurities hadn't yet eaten away at my personality, and I was at ease. That's the sort of shit that breeds love. It's not about trying to figure your oh-so-complicated self out. It's about not giving a shit, and relaxing your mind so that your heart can take over.

What's behind all this lovey-dovey bullshit? Well, I just finished watching Before Sunrise with Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. It was one of those rare romance movies that actually penetrated my thick layers upon layers of denial and pessimism, and tickled something inside, which in turn inspired me to get all gay and express myself here. I'll probably regret writing this later on, when I leave this post-romance-movie delerium. But right at this moment, I'm glad to see that that stupid naive little boy in me still exists. Because although he might be foolish and vulnerable, at least he's capable of feeling love.

You should check out Before Sunrise. It's a sweet little film that's refreshingly human. No big explosions, or bare boobies in this one. Just a simple love story, with two ordinary people, and lots of good dialogue. And hey, Siskel and Ebert gave it "two thumbs up".

2001-04-01T03:02:00.000-04:00

Just another note: Why does the "rocket" smell so much? I'm referring to the TTC subway. Everytime I get on and sit down, I notice this smell, this pugent, odd odour. Obviously, I check myself first and for awhile, I thought it was my jacket. But I realized I only notice it when I get onto the subway.

It smells like feet, cheese, and armpit all rolled into... a subway.

In the future, whenever I smell somebody's bad feet while eating a brick of old cheese while scratching my armpit, I will always remember those heady co-op days riding the rocket.

2001-04-01T01:42:00.000-05:00

Well, since nobody really blogs here anymore, I'm just gonna claim this space as my own, since there are already cool graphics, courtesy of Dave.

Anyways, I've been meaning to write stuff, but I've either been too busy, too tired, too much Survivor, or the damn blog site didn't work. I initially meant to post on the 28th, which has some crazy significance.

The significance being that there's only one more month to the end of the work term. Now, I know there's many of you who are crying about how work sucks and so on and so forth (myself definitely included) -- and it does, don't get me wrong. Everyone is making the mad dash towards the finish line. But think of what's at the finish line? No, it's not a fancy ribbon you run through. No, it's not a gold medal or a pot of gold with a leperchaun (or just a leper). It's not even people ready to dump so-called Gatorade on you. It's school! Remember that thing we really hated and couldn't wait to finish? Well, that what's at the finish line -- a place that smells like goose shit. Yes, school sure had its bright spots, but all I can remember at this point is failing midterms, hangovers, and being holed up in the library because of the first two reasons.

I guess the moral of this story is that we all need a change whenever we are stuck in a rut. Unfortunately, we keep going from school (bad) to work (bad), back to school (refer to bad). We need a vacation (good) to break this ugly cycle. But, it just isn't gonna happen so we'll just hafta deal with it by skipping class.

So, the grass is greener on the other side -- but only from a distance. Once we get there, we find out the grass is all dried up and Dave's trying to roll it. Oops, I didn't just say that. Nevermind. Why aren't I just erasing this if I want to recant my last comment?

My parting comments: This one's for you, Dave.

Actually, nevermind. I was gonna post a picture of a spliff which Dave gave me, but I don't know how and I have no patience to find out how.

U bitch!

2001-03-27T19:08:00.000-05:00

I noticed no one's been blogging here for a while, so let me do the honours of breaking the streak.

Ever seen daylight not from behind windows on a weekday? It's one of those things you take for granted when you're not at work 5 days/week (more for you accounting peeps). The sun's out and you breathe in and think "man it's great to be alive and not be stuck inside a stuffy ol' building!" The bank's are opened, the kids are in school, and the streets aren't piled up with cars. Too bad most of us won't get to enjoy a nice relaxing weekday for most of our lives. Makes me wanna quit work and school on the spot.

2001-03-21T23:23:00.000-05:00

Do you ever get that feeling that you are getting old? Like, really old?

Let's see, just last year, many of us were 19 -- still a number that exudes youth. Its the pinnacle of your teens, a totally carefree time. A year before that, we were 18 and living the joke called high school. A year before that, we were 17 and high school was even easier and there wasn't any pressure to pad your marks for University. At 16... well, you get the point. Being 16 was a whopping 5 years ago! I can remember it like yesterday, and often, I keep thinking I'll wake up from this dream and take the school bus to school and continue with my teenage life.

But no, this is for real. There is no waking up and realizing you're 16. Its waking up while it is dark and trudging off to work. It's slaving away for the 'man' for 10 hrs a day, only to come home, eat, then sleep, only to continue this cycle. Thank goodness this is only co-op and it ends soon, but I often wonder how other people do the rat-race for a boggling 50 years? A better question is, how will I do this for 50 years??

As you can see, I like my wine and cheese without the cheese. But, my point is that the whole dynamics of my life changed so rapidly, I'm still in shock, I guess. Co-op has opened my eyes -- to a mundane, responsibility (stress?) filled future. This is my life... from this point on (well, when school finishes). The fag in me asks, "will there ever be a rainbow -- and is there a man at the end?" (It's just a joke...)

I can see how people go through mid-life crisis'. Imagine the point in your life where you truly know everything is down hill from this point on. We have all lived our lives, so far, knowing that the future will be bright -- we have something to look forward to. But I've come to the top of the mountain and I don't like what I see. I try to go back, but I lose my footing as the ground crumbles and I tumble down. (again, more wine and cheese sans the cheese)

Today at work, it was one of my friend's birthday. He's 22... wow... and he's only a year older... yowsers. I asked him, "are you scared of getting older?" He said, "of course, but I'm embracing my 20's." Now why would he say that? Well, he said a lot of older people, and when I mean old, I don't me twenty something, said that they rank their 20's as the hi-light of their lives and their teens as SECOND.

Huh??

Well, think about it. You're totally free... You don't live with your parents (maybe). You'll have gobs of money cause you'll have a full-time job. And you'll get to keep all that money cause you don't have any kids. As for having free time, I'm apparently in the busy time for my profession and the rest of the year is pretty laid back. So there you have it -- money, time, and freedom. Isn't that what we all want? Well, that's what I want.The future is bright.

"Just don't get hitched", my friend said. "Then your life is TRULY over."

2001-03-20T12:41:00.000-05:00

In response to Steph U's post (right below): Interesting point steph, how if you were a mean-ass to your loved one, and they died the next day, how you feel and stuff. I've actually thought about this before, and here's my (possibly cliche) response.

I think at that point, you would look back and into yourself, and if your love for this person was real and true, your bitter last words or any mistakes that you made in the past should be inconsequential, because those things are just surface things, mostly just products of small miscommunications or something like that. On the other hand, if your love for this person wasn't truly wholesome and real, you would know it in your heart, and I'm sure that guilt would eat away at you for the rest of your life. I guess that's why its so important to be virtuous as often as possible, if not for the sake of your friends and loved ones, then at least for the sake of your own conscience. A cynic (like me) might see that as selfishness, but maybe its all just a manifestation of our inherent drive towards doing good. Just my two cents.

2001-03-20T10:40:00.000-05:00

You know, people should really start being a lot more respectful and kinder to the people they love or hold close to their heart. I know that many people take it for granted sometimes that these special people are close to them, and it's easier to let your guard down in front of these people. You tend to let your feelings go with these people, whether they may be feelings of happiness, anger or whatever simply because these are the people you are most comfortable with. But if these people are so special to you, then why would these people be the first ones to see your anger?...why would they be the ones you take your anger out on? Think of it this way,...someone very special to you, someone whom you hold really close to your heart, you suddenly burst out a rage on. They either had done something that may have displeased you in some way, or maybe these people are not even the ones you are really mad at, but you need someone to be there to listen to how angry you are and to let your frustration out on. Ok...that's understandable,...you're pissed off and the only people you can really let your anger out to is the people who you are most comfortable with. But if that person had somehow died the very next day, how would feel?
Wouldn't you think that maybe you could have ended off on a better note?...Any regrets?

2001-03-20T08:30:00.000-05:00

A week ago I was thinking of making a homepage, but when I took a look at a friend's page source, I ran for my life. NO WAY I was gonna learn all that html crap. But for some reason, I came running back and got one started, and I guess I've been feeling quite productive because of it. (I just wish I was as productive in school...) Anyways, for someone who didn't even know what a tag was a week ago, I would say I've come a LONG way. Check out what I have so far at http://www.angelfire.com/al3/AngelsHeaven or there's a link from my blog. Only a couple of the pages work for now, but let me know what you think! It's just html, none of that java crap. I'm a mad scientist, not a computer geek!

2001-03-19T23:28:00.000-05:00

I just don't understand.

Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Christ.

Valentine's day is in tribute to the guy who shoots arrows at your ass.

Victoria Day is a day we honour the Queen of England (the old Queen).

But St. Patrick's day? Who is he? What did he do? Why is there a subway stop named after him? How come I never get off there? For some reason, this day is intertwined with drinking. Actually, from what I gather, it JUST about drinking. Like, Christmas has presents, family, and good food. New Year's has drinking, and possibly weed -- but the celebration is about the coming of another year. Almost every holiday has drinking as an ancillary activity, but St. Patrick's day seems to have drinking as the focus of celebration. Strange isn't it?

But, I'm not complaining about this. I'm just pondering this strange little holiday. I'm sure St. Patrick did some good stuff, like feeding Irish children potatoes during the famine. But, somehow it just manifested itself into shamrock and drinking shananigans.

Yes, I did drink this weekend. It's the greatest excuse to do so -- "the holiday told me too". But alas, no green beer for me. It was red wine, which was a big mistake. Chairs were literally falling on me.

I finally saw Charlie's Angels!!!

2001-03-19T16:22:00.000-05:00

Shitty weekend...shitty midterm...shitty exam schedule...what next??

Check out my blog....http://stephbo.blogspot.com./

I think that's it....oh wells....
Culture show this wed....come one...come all...although..I know all you Co-op peeps are not gonna...cuz you all too LAAAZY.....
Hey Dave...you quoting songs on here now?!?!

2001-03-19T13:28:00.000-05:00

S.O.S... my secret office stress
S.O.S... it's time that we confess
L.O.V.E. love!
Can't live without you (dee... da da da dee....)

Everybody's gone.. computer crazy.
And before long, we'll be replacing,
man with machines, who can talk and can thi-nk.

2001-03-19T13:25:00.000-05:00

Sunny days, I don't wanna work cause it's so nice out.
Rainly days, I don't wanna work cause it's so shitty out.
Hmm, maybe the weather really has nothing to do with all this.

2001-03-19T04:52:00.000-05:00

A friend of Dave's from highschool and Waterloo.

2001-03-18T15:13:00.000-05:00

S.O.S.

I'm in dire need of someone to help me fix my blog. I don't know a damn thing about computers so yeah...I would like to set up a comments and links section on my page...Do u guys even check my page? I hope that this isn't a wasted effort...if so, Dave..YOU'RE DEAD!! =Þ

What's with Jeiwsh ppl and the #18??

Btw...who is Alan Poon???

2001-03-16T14:38:00.000-05:00

They say the grass is always greener on the other side.
Well, of course it is, cause where I am, there ain't no grass at all.
I heard that on the other side, the grass grows inthe shape of the Bermuda Triangle. That excites me.

2001-03-16T05:21:00.000-05:00

hmm.... what's up...

Anyways... uhm... yeah, just felt like typing something... nothing disillusioning or abstruse, I'll leave the philisophical dissention for the willing and able :) Been reading some Dostoevsky, really screwing with my mind... pick up Brothers Karamazov if you have the time, it's by far the most important book I've read in my life.... pretty damned humbling....

Adolf Hitler is alive and well.
I slept with her last night.
Come out from behind that fake mustache Adolf, I know you're in there!

Wonder why there's a black cloud hovering over the age of 20 something, I don't find it so bad... I think I'm happy for the first time in a long time (had to handle depression which I'm quite certain reached the clinical level for the second time in my life). Anyways, let's go out to dinner, go to a jazz club, cigar lounge, or just come over and we'll crack open a bottle of wine.... go to a strip club .... watch a movie (for a change of pace, check out theatres like the Cinematheque at the art gallery, I have a membership there).... go to a casino, shoot some pool, watch a basketball or hockey game from the Sprite zone, or better yet, go play some ball... hell, even karaoke.... ... gimme a call if you're bored, I'm always in Toronto on the weekends, and always up for something :) I dunno, for some reason I just started meeting a lot of people, and life just doesn't seem so mundane anymore.

Well, whatever... oh yeah, a few excellent movies out there... In the Mood for Love, O Brother Where art Thou, and Emperor's New Groove (yeah, the cartoon)... check 'em out if you got the chance....

Insomnia ain't fun.... can't sleep till 7, and can't sleep more than 3-4 hours a night... leaves me more waking hours though, I suppose I treasure the utility. are you overwhelmed with an urge to give an existential discourse on the matter, and perhaps relatedly slide in your contention on the ethics behind genetic engineering?..... uhm... yeah... never mind.... sorry that was stupid

Controversy wouldn't be bad though, I'm bored of slapping around algorithms and theorems (3 math courses, 2 computer science courses), I need something with substance. Marching Elephants, The Great Temptation, Malformed Dissonance.... ahh whatever, yeah I'm losing it.... ahh well

"If you couldn't find any weirdness, maybe we'll just have to MAKE some!"
"Now yer talkin"

2001-03-15T18:25:00.000-05:00

I can now legally drink and drive.

I got my G today... barely. Apparently, you're supposed to be in the dispatch lanes 30 mins BEFORE your appointment. I was completely unaware of this and I arrived in the dispatch lanes 15 mins early. So, in essence, I was late. Well, those driving dumbasses decide to punish my "tardy" ass. They made me wait 2 hrs in my car! An examiner would walk out, look at me, which would get me all excited -- then walk to another car. You bastard! You frickin' salad tosser! If you're ever gonna toss my salad, I'll make sure I'll never wipe when I take a dump!!

Back to the reason I barely passed. Being in a car for 2 hours does several things to you. It gets you very hungry and it makes you wanna pee. I had no idea when someone was coming to test me, so I had to stay put. *Tick-tock*, "Man, I'm getting hungry." *Tick-tock*, "Man, I'm gonna wet my pants." So, finally, the examiner comes and we commence. Probably half way through the exam, I'm at the point where I know I'm not doing too well. Stomach and bladder are vying for my attention more than the road. I had to do something to get on the examiner's good side. So I started talking to the guy for a bit... Talking about the car I was driving... Talking about how the car goes fast (he said I was a lead foot). As I kept driving, I realized he was starting to give me hints of what I'm doing wrong. Actually, he said, "I'm giving you a hint." So, looks like I got the ball rolling.

When we pulled into the examination centre, I knew the verdict was coming. I was ready to pee right there and then. He said, "Well, Matt, you just barely passed..." After that, I just tuned out and had a smile on my face.

So this is a lesson for all of you who still have your G2's. Don't let some of the 7 deadly sins get you.

First sin: sloth -- Don't wait till the last minute to sign up for your G cause its too much pressure if you're that close to license expiration. Mine was November -- yikes.
Second sin: pride -- If you are worried about what people will think if you fail, then it will happen.
Third sin: lust -- Don't watch porn right before taking your test. You can't concentrate. Every stop light will look like a booby.

I don't remember the other sins. I'm trying to refer back to the movie Seven, but all I can remember is the really fat guy, the guy who had to wear a knife on his schlong, and Gwenyth Paltrow's head being held up in the air.

Ahh... what a movie. What the hell was I talking about again? Oh well, who cares.

2001-03-15T18:11:00.000-05:00

Antoher long day of work.... I think I'm getting old, dammit. What do we do when we get together now? Before we used to have good ideas, new ideas, but we've done everything.... and all that's left is Timmies, PS2, and Bingo!!!!!!!1 Although Bingo wasn't exactly the friendliest of all places, I realized again what it feels like to be a minority again, considering St. Rob's was 80% Asian.

Annnd.... I can't stay up alte anymore Frick, I can't even stay up past 1:30 anymore Give us a couple years and we'll be sleeping at 10 right after a wild night of playing bridge.. =(

Anyhow, I think I'm falling in love with donuts. I've been eating them quite often lately. Soon I will be fat bastard.... =/ ah well........ as long as I can eat the ones with teh sparkles on top.

Oh yeah.. before I forget, Ian if you ever read this.. I love you man... no, really.... =/

Another rant down.. I'll talk to you later!!!!! =P Take it eas-e.

2001-03-15T17:35:00.000-05:00

This is weird. Its cool, but weird. I slept at midnight last nite!!!!!! A first for me since ........... i dont' know. It was so refreshing that I was so wide awake at 6! ha .... whatever. So i'm here in the stupid library. I just took an hour nap on the couch with my friends. We all had our jackets covering our heads coz it was so damn bright. I woke up coz i couldn't breathe ..... cool ................

I refuse to be 21 ...... =)

2001-03-15T14:09:00.000-05:00

The weirdest thing just happened to me right now....my cell phone rang while at work, so excitedly I picked it up, thinking that maybe I had won the million dollar cash prize from the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepsteakes....but alas...not such luck...it was simply a little kid asking for his mother....HIS MOTHER?! WTF?!

Anyway...that was my excitement for the day...BTW...what the heck is up with everyone catching the Blogger fever? Damn you Dave...

p.s. Come check out my page...I updated it today...damn...at times like these I wish I was in CS so I could make cool looking webpages myself...actually...not really...muhahaha....

2001-03-15T13:54:00.000-05:00

man these stories are pretty depressing no offense... i take it life at twenty-something really does suck doesn't it... i wonder what life at thirty-something's gonna be like... now THAT's depressing.... let's make a checklist of stuff we have to do before we hit 30 shall we? let's see.........

Skydive
Go somewhere with all our friends (all inclusive resort of course)
Parasailing
Snorkeling
Scuba Diving
Bum around Europe

dammit that's all i've got so far... but for now let's go rock climbing eh Shin? how bout some paintball?.. i got my ass shot to death last time (literally my ass) but what the hell.. i'm down.

2001-03-15T06:36:00.000-05:00

I woke up so early today that I wanted to puke. Literally.
After eating a large bowl of cereal (only the actual bowl was large), I made my way out the door, and took in a very very deep breath of the cool early morning air. There's something about the morning air. There's something about early morning in general. Something strangely tranquil. That whole feeling quickly died when this mammoth black truck license-plate 334 OAT cut my ass off. I looked at myself with a strange face of suprise and disgust, however much sense that makes, and thought: Let's ride... [with an evil grin] I pressed his ass and pushed him to 115Km/h in the 60 zone, and that's when he backed down, brakelights shining brilliant red against the dim morning light. My foot hit the clutch, and with one quick downshift and an even quicker right-left tilting of my steering wheel, he was yesterday's news. Punk.

While on the topic of roads and roadrage, Al Palladini, former Ontario Minister of Transport, passed away. I just found that out in the local newspaper this morning, which means that it probably happened two weeks ago. Man, have I been living under a rock? The Rock?

2001-03-15T00:40:00.000-05:00

hmm...life at twenty-something...it f!$%ing sucks!!...we have nowhere to go and nothing to do anymore...coffee at Timmy's (all the coffee and donuts are going to our asses)...movie at derwin's place...nba live???...haha...or actually, the guys have no life...PS2 is their life...(which is very lame i might add)....but BINGO was a twist...and damn it! i was THISCLOSE to winning 1000 bux....and since school started again all i can say is that i'm SO stressed out!! i envy all you co-op students who don't have to worry about assignment due dates and getting together with your accounting or marketing group 2-3 times a week trying to figure out what the frick we are going to write or do for our projects and presentations....you wake up, go to work, come home and relax...i have so much work i'm practically drowning in it...damn schulich, damn york, and damn the stupid strike...yeah, we got 2 months of vacation but now we're paying the price...so stop laughing at us...you wouldn't be laughing in a few months when the tables have turned...

2001-03-14T23:44:00.000-05:00

What the hell is this? Like, really. What the hell?

Anyways, I did write some other stuff -- twice actually, but it somehow got lost. Some pretty good stuff. One rant was about when I sat beside this really smelly guy on the GO train and ended up falling asleep near him.

Yeah, it feels good to be 19 yrs old. I'm not even 20 and some of you guys are already 21.

I commute for way too long. I got home at 8 today. Another 13+ hr day for me, so what else is new? But, surprisingly this work term is flying by, and I'm not exactly crying to see it pass. Does that rhyme?

I'm practicing for my G-test and my parents FORCE me to take joyrides in my mom's new car. So its actually quite relaxing driving around for an hour in a nice car. Note: my definition of 'nice' is a car which can accelerate from 0 - 60 in under 2 mins and also has a speedometer.

Work sucks, my people. Now THAT rhymes...

2001-03-14T20:02:00.000-05:00

Frick man... sometimes I just want to scream too. Life as a co-op sucks ass. Especially when the computer guy at work told everybody that all the male co-op students were looking at porn. But we weren't even in the office. What a gimp. If I see that guy on the street out of the office I want to punch him in teh face. Defamation of character is a serious offence. That bastard. I can't walk around without people staring at me funny.

On a more sad note, school is almost here. Dang.. another 8 months of school. THAT SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!

I guess that's my rant for the day. Oh yeah.. I actually made money on teh stock market!!!! WOO HOO!!! bought at $0.28 and its' over $2.00 right now... NICE!

I'm off to play games.... I'll rant another time when the computer guy pisses me off. =P Eh.. take is eas-e.

2001-03-14T17:26:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I just want to scream. I wish I could read minds. Total, Instantaneous, and Complete Communication (TICC) should be the ultimate goal. Fuck Nirvana, or true happiness. Those are useless goals. TICC would solve so many problems. Your girlfriend's cheating on you? [SNAP], you find that out right away. You telepathically tell her that you're fuckin' pissed and that you're gonna ditch her. "NO! I promise it won't ever happen again" she screams in her mind, and you hear. You wonder if she's lying. [SNAP], the answer instantaneously pops into your head. And you don't like the answer.

Here's an analogy: Our minds are like a 2-million gigabyte high quality movie on some super hard drive. Most of us communicate with others through media that are equivilant to an old-ass 2400bps phone modem. Some of us are a little better at communicating. But still the hard truth is if we wanna watch that whole 2-million gig movie, we're gonna hafta be patient. REAL patient. So fuck it, let's just all make assumptions, and let our insecurities steer our minds into predicting that the huge plot twist at the end of the movie is simply this: They all die. [grin]

2001-03-14T17:20:00.000-05:00

Life at Twenty-Something?!? Holy shit!...we're getting to be frickin old!...i guess sometimes we just don't realize these things cuz we still think of ourselves as kids...and we forget that we're already 21...dang...For those of you who are on workterm (who is pretty much everyone I know that goes to Waterloo-except for myself), sucks to be you..jus joking...I will be coming up to visit...well..not really you guys..just KeKe..haha..JOKING!...again....All I can say is that I'm so relieved to almost have finished my second year...pretty soon, you can call me StephBO...the ECONOMIST!!!...great title eh?...NOT!!...what the hell do economists do anyway? Can ANYONE tell me?..I guess it's better to be in stuff like Engineering and Accountancy (oppss, sorry...CHARTERED Accountancy!..my bad), cuz then you already have you career planned out...me?..I'm just glad that I'm makin' A's this term so I can haul my sorry ass back into Honours...but then again...it all matters in Fourth year anyway...so to all you Engineers, Accountants, and CS freak...don't expect me to give you props till you're actually done...alight?...wicked...
So, how was that Dave?...where do I set up my own??

Laterz,...my "Twenty-something" folk...

2001-03-14T00:36:00.000-05:00

And I don't wanna do nuttin' to hurt, my baby girl...
So baby girl put it on me.
What do you guys think of the new layout? twelve frickin' thirty, and my eyelids are droopy. my brain is slowing, and I realize that it's about time to call it quits. You know, these days I feel like I would like to have 2 or 3 more hours in a day. accompanied by a boost in energy too. That way, I could do all the shit I want. And I spend the least time commuting and stuff out of all you. I can't imagine how it would be to hafta commute as far as good ol' Matt. I think I'd become all braindead, and all slow and shit so by the time I sit down and log onto blogger, the only thing my gimpy brain would be able to muster up is a retarded question:"What the hell is this?". =) Goodnite folks.

2001-03-13T22:24:00.000-05:00

What the hell is this?

2001-03-13T16:12:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone,

Come check out my blog http://step-on-me.blogspot.com/ I just started yesterday and it's still pretty gay...but check it out...I'm trying to be all philosophical and "Edgy" like those ppl who write on AA... (sigh) I'm such a looooser.
Anyway...Dave, how do I make a comments page?

p.s. Wish me luck...going to talk to my boss

2001-03-13T15:18:00.000-05:00

Ahh, finally some life in this blog..

As I entered the bathroom today, I ran into my boss. Actually, it was my boss's boss. We exchanged the usual courteous "Hello"s and this is when it got weird. We both went to the toilet stalls. No, not the same one. And yes, I put a few stalls between us as a buffer. Anyhow, while doin my business, I couldn't help but to feel very strange. I guess it's probably cause we knew who was 'over there' the few stalls down. It wasn't just a pair of shoes with pants draped over. It was a human being, and he had a name. And I just talked to the guy. I'm just glad he didn't try to start a conversation with me.

2001-03-13T15:08:00.000-05:00

Hey... you're not in Comp Eng... shut the fuck up! HUAHAHA!
**Admin's Comment: Please refrain from swearing. There is no need for such profanity. Fuckin' gimp. =)

2001-03-13T14:58:00.000-05:00

hey all =P

2001-03-13T14:45:00.000-05:00

jasd;flksjdf

2001-03-13T14:01:00.000-05:00

Alright, so if you wanna post to this blog, I'm gonna need to know your emails, and I'll send out an email that has all the instructions. So email or icq me. I have high hopes for this site. As soon as things get rolling, I'll take suggestions for our layout. If I haven't bugged you guys a million times already and you don't know what a blog is all about, check out my personal blog here. This blog's gonna be for the waterloo peeps, as well as my HS buds. Hopefully this will be a great way for all of us to get to know each other more, and share our thoughts. If you have other friends you wanna include, then great. Just let me know, and I'll hook you up.

Let the communal blogging begin.

2001-03-13T13:53:00.000-05:00

Alright boys and girls. Here it is. The Beginning. The Gathering. The communal weblog.